As I age and feel regrets, I find myself reflecting on Memento Mori.

You could leave life right now

I worry less about what is on the other side of death. Know one knows for sure. I will be dead and by definition there will be little I can do to change whatever is on the other side of this life.

Rather, when I focus on death I think about the time I have left and if death will sneak up on me as it is doing right now or if it will come unexpectedly.

Yesterday, I had my wisdom teeth out. Due to the circumstances it required surgey and sedation.

As I was feeling myself drifting I asked for my wife’s hand - they were kind enough to allow her to be in the room until I dosed off.

I was feeling myself drift. It was not unlike sleep but just different enough condsidering the circumstances. With sleep you feel some control and a sense that you will wake up. In this case, I was thinking this must be what death is like a gentle fading away and not being sure if this is it.

What I said out loud that I am reporting here was told to me by my wife since I do not recall more than the feeling I have expressed.

I love you and you are my world.
I do not want to die.

Corny and silly perhaps.

There was nothing about the procedure or the doctor that caused me any concern.

It was the fact that I have more I want to do. And if this is it for me then I have things left undone.

Always remember, you could leave this life right now.

With Kindness and Love
Your friend.